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Friday, September 6, 2019

My Guess Was Correct...

So, my guess was completely correct. There's a lot of people out there who developed social anxiety because of the judgement happening around them but can people really help it? They can't. Why? The younger generations nowadays don't know any better. What starts off as a...'friendly' tease or insult can be traumatizing for another. Especially with how the internet functions nowadays, the level of understanding of humor, tease, or insult, is pretty much unpredictable because everyone's understanding is literally on a different level compared to everyone else. I posted a video on Tik Tok today after getting my root canal because I wanted to let people know that looks aren't everything; it's personality that makes the impact. A few hours later, a teenager/young adult commented saying they needed to hear this. At first, I only thanked them by saying I'm glad I could help and thanks for watching but then I was like wait a minute, what am I doing? I'm taking it one step further, I want to see if I can actually  help them. So then I DM'd them and also left a second comment telling them I DM'd them. A few hours later, they DM'd me on Instagram.

  We talked and within three minutes, I figured out what their issue was and it's exactly what I had thought, because I went through basically the same thing they did. What's unfortunate is they're in high school so I know what they went through, emotionally, I just don't know how bad it actually is because it's been nearly a decade since I graduated. Holy shit time flies, I just realized that LOL. But then I realized it didn't matter because all human psychological concepts are the same. The healing process is the same, just the experience may vary. So after understanding where they came from, I told them my perspective and what they should work on and even they said it was a good suggestion so that tells me, I'm on the right track. We had a good talk and I even told them if they ever needed to reach out to me, feel free to do so whenever because I'll be here. We need more people doing this, these kids need help, desperately. And with how the world is progressing at the moment, with everything becoming so competitive, it's only getting worse. About 95% of tik tok videos I watch on the feature page has the tik tokker saying they have social anxiety, which is insane.

So please, please, please, if you can help someone out who's either got social anxiety, depression, or even both, that would be amazing. Who knows, you could be the person to help change their life around. I may have been able to help this young and still growing adult and I'll continue helping as many people as I possibly can. We all need help, let's help each other.

Tuesday, September 3, 2019

Do Whatever You WANT To Do

It's...that simple. If there's a job you want, apply for that job. If there's someone you like, ask them out. If there's a pair of shoes you want, buy them. It's literally THE most liberating feeling ever. I've literally been doing whatever I want for the past few weeks ever since that saturday and it's been absolutely amazing. Not a care in the world if someone thinks I'm too energetic, or too crazy, or just outright insane. It's me and I want to experience life, and have fun. I started this blog, I went back to doing YouTube videos which I haven't done in years. I brought my camera everywhere with me during the Labor Day Weekend and filmed whatever I wanted, still documenting my insights.

Did I get a lot of looks in Monterey that day? Yes I did LOL. I don't know how much time the average person spends on the internet, but some people still find it amusing how some people hold a camera on top of a tripod and looks as if they're talking to themselves. I brought my action cam to Monterey on Saturday, filmed the amazing drive there, continued filming on the 17 mile drive with plenty of people walking by me, staring at me to see what the fuck I was doing. Ended the day in Carmel, filmed my outro there with a good number of people walking by me again and they all looked. Did I care? Nope. It's for my entertainment and I enjoyed it.

The following Monday, my family and I went to the outlet mall. The day before, Sunday, we went to Union Square up in San Francisco and I had planned on purchasing a pair of shoes to replace my current pair because they were wearing out. I didn't get shoes from Union Square because they were close to $180/pair and I wasn't about to spend close $200 on some pair of sneakers. If it were some classy dress shoes for all types of occasions, maybe the $200 price tag would be worth it but certainly not for some random pair of sneakers. That's why I waited until we went to Livermore the next day. As I walked into the Nike store, I realized they didn't sell the pair of 720s I wanted and I thought oh crap, I might be walking out of here empty handed and I was already ready to accept that fact. But then I walked around and my parent pointed out another section to me. At this section, it was either a vapormax that had a gray body and pink/green bottom or a blue/red airmax 270. At first, I shied away from the 270 but I couldn't help the fact the 270 felt more comfortable than the vapormax and I've always wanted a pair of shoes similar to the 270. Also, I've never worn such vibrant shoes before and I didn't see anyone even give this pair a second of their time so I knew I'd be the only one getting them. For the first time ever, I chose a pair of shoes that were out of my comfort zone without hesitation. I confidently told my mom and sibling I was going to get these. I could tell they were kind of iffy about it because they've never seen me wear vibrant shoes before and all my mom said, was as long as you wear them, that's all that matters. At the time of this post going up, I just wore them out today and got a lot of looks and if I was being completely transparent, they look absolutely amazing in the sun. Not only do they look good, I stepped out of my comfort zone, and no one has anything close to these shoes. I have no regrets.

I'm on Tik Tok now and I had an interesting little chat with a 15 year old. I know that sounds weird but give me a second and hear me out LOL. The background music she used was Nobody's Perfect by, we all know, Hannah Montana. I posted a simple comment saying it was one of her best songs back in the late 2000s because this song, along with two other songs, were one of the few I enjoyed from her best of both worlds album when it came out, and that's literally what I said to her. It must have been interesting to her having a 25 year old guy shooting her that comment out of nowhere LOL but I did it because I like having conversations with different people on Tik Tok. I also asked someone about her caption and which episode of The Vampire Diaries it was from. She most likely didn't expect that either. Side note, yes I absolutely love Nina Dobrev. The good thing about Tik Tok that I absolutely enjoy is having the ability to talk with random people wherever and whenever. It's super spontaneous and keeps things interesting.

So, here's the lesson I learned. Who gives a fuck if other people judge you? They're not living your life. They won't allow you to control their life. Just because they won't do it, are you willing to let them control yours just because their personal fears held them back? Are you willing to give them the cards and let them choose your cards for you? I bet a lot of people judged me already for the shoes, bringing my camera everywhere, and posting those comments on Tik Tok but do I give a fuck? I don't, honestly. It's the most liberating fucking feeling ever, and it fucking feels fantastic and I'm not fucking stopping. What do YOU want to do?